Nothing really new here, just humorous. Sorry for the all-caps, I didn't feel like re-typing it.
1. HOW MUCH DEEPER WOULD THE OCEAN BE WITHOUT SPONGES?
2. EAGLES MAY SOAR, BUT WEASELS DO NOT GET SUCKED INTO JET ENGINES.
3. WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU GET SCARED HALF TO DEATH TWICE?
4. I USED TO HAVE AN OPEN MIND BUT MY BRAINS KEPT FALLING OUT.
5. I COULDN'T REPAIR YOUR BRAKES, SO I MADE YOUR HORN LOUDER.
6. WHY DO PSYCHICS HAVE TO ASK YOU FOR YOUR NAME?
7. INSIDE EVERY OLDER PERSON IS A YOUNGER PERSON WONDERING WHAT HAPPENED?
8. LIGHT TRAVELS FASTER THAN SOUND, WHICH IS WHY SOME PEOPLE APPEAR BRIGHT -- UNTIL YOU HEAR THEM SPEAK.
One-liners
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