Daevan'shi: Prologue [Non tribes]

[RedSirus]

For a little over a year now, I've been working on a short novel (it's at 101 pages at the moment), and I've recieved some feedback from a few useful sources (like Bug!). I put so much work into this project that at one point it became my Final Term Project for Writer's Craft class (Project mark: 97%)<br>I just thought I'd share the opening scene with y'all. As always, constructive criticism is much appreciated.<br><br>Enjoy!<br> [Est. reading time, 10-20 minutes (8 "book pages" long)<br><br><br>Alright, here's the link. Now GO!<br><!--EZCODE AUTOLINK START--><a href="http://www.geocities.com/nesster/Prolog ... <!--EZCODE AUTOLINK END--> <p><center><table border=0 cellpadding=0 cellspacing=5><td><img border="0" src="http://www.xmenclan.org/avatars/t2red.g ... ><td><font size=5>RedSirus<a href=mailto:redsirus@dragontalonmercs.com>@</a></font><br><br><a href=http://www.dragontalonmercs.com>Dragon Talon Mercenary</a> > <a href=http://server2.ezboard.com/bdragontalon ... ><br><font size=2><a href=http://pub18.ezboard.com/bdtmonlinecommunity>DTM Community</a> > <a href=http://pub18.ezboard.com/fdtmonlinecomm ... s>RedSirus' Reviews</a></font><br><br><a href=http://www.xmenclan.org>Brainwashed Fishmonger</a> > <a href=http://pub3.ezboard.com/bxmenclan>Forum ... ><i>Edited by: <A HREF=http://pub3.ezboard.com/uredsirus.showP ... s</A>&nbsp; <IMG HEIGHT=10 WIDTH=10 SRC="http://www.ezboard.com/ezgfx/gicons/black_fire.gif" BORDER=0> at: 9/21/01 11:52:29 pm<br></i>

[Ambush Bug]

This is some good stuff, folks, and well worth the read. Two antennae up! <!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :D --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/im ... /happy.gif ALT=":D"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> <p><BR><img src=http://home.earthlink.net/~ambushbugdtm/BugSig.jpg align=LEFT><BR>Member: DTM, XMEN, SeXy<BR>The Drunken ArtilleryBug!<BR>"Roj, target is *hic* <b>DAWWWG</b>-meat!"</p><i></i>

[X Rogue]

What, artillery bugs don't have thumbs? <!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :) --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/im ... /smile.gif ALT=":)"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> <br><br>Good work, Red! <!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :) --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/im ... /smile.gif ALT=":)"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> <p><img src="http://www.xmenclan.org/avatars/rogue_av.jpg" border="0" align="left" width="142" height="200">"Fare well wherever you fare,<BR> until your eyries receive you at your journey's end."</p><i></i>

[XMEN Temujin]

Very good. Now you have me wanting to read more... <!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :) --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/im ... /smile.gif ALT=":)"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> <p>XMEN|Temujin|DTM<br><br><img src="http://www.xmenclan.org/temujin4.jpg"><br><br>"At times, mistakes are the best things to happen." - </p><i></i>

[XMENPorsche]

Alright, gosh darn it, where's the rest?!?<br><br>Excellent reading, but I want more. Get to work, Reya! <p><BR><img src=http://www.xmenclan.org/avatars/porsche2.jpg align=left><BR>XMENPorsche[DTM]<BR>Semi-retired Leader of the XMEN<BR>Co-Leader - Dragon Talon Mercenaries<BR>Citizen of New Fenecia<BR>Eater of Chicken Fried Steak<BR><br>"You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take." - Wayne Gretzky<br><br>"Stupidity is like nuclear power; it can be used for good or evil... and you don't want to get any on you." - Dilbert</p><i></i>

[Ravok99]

<br><br>Great stuff, Red! But you left me asking, "Now what?!" Heheheheh. I am looking forward to more tales of Reya. <p><BR> XMEN[Ravok-99]DTM</p><i></i>

[Scorch]

Nice <!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :) --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/im ... /smile.gif ALT=":)"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> <p><A HREF=mailto:sirscorch@excite.com ></A> <OBJECT classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://active.macromedia.com/flash2/cab ... on=4,0,0,0" ID=Scorch WIDTH=440 HEIGHT=320> <PARAM NAME=movie VALUE="http://www.angelfire.com/games/scorchdtm/Scorch.swf"> <PARAM NAME=quality VALUE=high> <PARAM NAME=bgcolor VALUE=#000000> <EMBED src="Scorch.swf" quality=high bgcolor=#000000 WIDTH=440 HEIGHT=320 TYPE="application/x-shockwave-flash" PLUGINSPAGE="http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/dow ... </p><i></i>